If there is a God, He will have to beg my forgiveness.
lucas bit my ass and this truly terrifying thing happened
someone mentioned april fools today, and it reminded me that last year a couple of radio DJs got taken off the air and almost faced felony charges because they told their audience that the local water supply was contaminated with “Dihydrogen Monoxide” and alot of people panicked
Dihydrogen - (two hydrogen)
Monoxide - (one oxygen)
some guys almost got arrested for telling people there was water in their taps.
She wore black too often and always had eyeliner falling down her face; when people told her she looked pretty and mysterious and said they’d do anything to solve the puzzle that was her mind, she’d laugh at them because there was no substance behind her thin smiles and dead eyes, just sadness that no boy had ever sucked out of her, and God only knows how many had tried.
Most mornings, she swallowed too many painkillers with shots of whiskey and stumbled through the hallways with sick, slurred words spilling from her lips; when her teachers told her she’d never make it in the real world, she’d laugh at them because she knew there was no fucking way she’d survive much longer anyway, no matter what anyone said.
She used to beat up all the boys in her class when she was little, but she began trading them her body for old cigarettes and half-empty bottles of alcohol; when they told her they loved her, she’d laugh at them because if she let them see the things that ran through her mind, they’d leave her faster than she left home when she was sixteen.
She lost her mind when she was fourteen and had more than enough scars to prove it; when people told her she was destroying herself, she’d laugh at them because that was the whole point.
Oh—you wouldn’t date a girl who’s ever been a stripper?
In that case, I wouldn’t date a guy who’s ever been to a strip club.
Oh—you wouldn’t date a girl who’s ever done porn?
In that case, I wouldn’t date a guy who’s ever watched porn.
You’re the reason we exist.
You’re the demand to our supply.
If you disdain sex workers, don’t you dare consume our labor.
As they say in the industry, “People jack off with the left hand and point with the right.”
yo gettin married at 22 sounds a lot like leavin a party at 9:30 pm
yeah but you get to leave the party with your favorite person on the planet, and take off all of your makeup, and put on your ugly comfortable clothes and make popcorn and curl up in your bed and watch a movie, and have sex and go to sleep, idk how that sounds like a bad thing.
And everyone else just wakes up alone and hungover.
this is the best thing ive ever heard
if you’re a boy and you cry it is not dumb and you are not a pussy you’re a fucking human being